LINK:  www.gorillamask.net

You're one of those smart idiots.  You went or go to a state school and still make dirty sanchez jokes and ponder why a gorilla mask sounds so similar to an abe lincoln, coming to the conclusion that the angry pirate is still the best.  You realize, at this somewhat disheartening moment, that you're too old to refer to hooking up with a girl as 'banging her,' but you do it anyway. 
-Lansbury