In America’s continual strive to make clothing more and more casual comes the invention of Crocs, because hey, sandals were just wayyyy too dressy.  Good job America; we are succeeding in ridding our country of any kind of style and fashion because we just don’t care because were fat, I mean full figured, no I mean fat.

It’s funny to think that just a year ago the only ones who wore these shoes were little boys and mental institutional patients.  May I add neither of which had a choice.

All in one shampoo/conditioner, grape jelly/peanut butter in one jar - the list of products that support American Laziness goes on.  Well now you have a shoe that doesn’t scuff, break down, fade, and fuck, just hose those bitches down and let them air dry and you’re back in it.  Unique stylized lines and colors are taken from the ever so fashionable “I am too much of a pussy to step on the ocean floor” Aqua Socks.

I always hope to see a person wearing these things at the local gas station for I believe they are the key to unlocking one of my greatest mysteries.  Who the fuck buys those pink marshmallows balls?
-Tad Landon