Damn it.  Why did I volunteer to get beers for the group?  I feel like such an asshole in this place.  Greg said that we were just going to some dive bar to meet these chicks that he works with, but this place isn't a dive at all.  I mean, what dive bar charges cover at the door and has a dress code?   Greg is such a dick.  These girls aren't even that hot anyway; I don't know what the fuck he is talking about.  Shit, I should have worn a button-down shirt; everyone here is looking at me because I'm like the only guy in here who is wearing a t-shirt.  It's like a damn Banana Republic fashion show in here.  Whatever.  They're all pussies and if shit gets rough... I'm sure that I kick the crap out of most of the guys here.  What should I order?  I need to order a mojito for Greg, a white wine for the brunette, and a vodka tonic for the redhead.  This is going to be expensive as hell.  Fuck, I just want a beer.  No, I can't order a beer because then I'll look like the sloppy t-shirt beer guy with no class.  Yeah, but I'd also look like the badass guy who doesn't care.  Damn it!  What should I get?  Shit, the bartender is looking at me!  OK, I'll just get a weak, pussy beer.  Yeah like an Amstel Light or something.  That way I'm like kind of rebel, but like also kind of classy too.  Right?  Yeah, the brunette will totally dig that.  Fuck yeah. 
-Friendly Fred