VEGAS ODDS:

You have visited Europe in the past 6 months:  3:1
If you had visited Europe in the past 6 months, then upon your arrival back in the states you exclusively chose to drink Guiness, even though its not as alcoholic as in Ireland (and made a point to tell all of your drinking buddies that the beer in America is “garbage” compared to European brews): 5:2
You are Irish:  5:1
You have an alcoholic uncle that has bought you at least one item of Guiness-branded merchandise:  4:1
You say the word “Brilliant” (mimicking the recent ad campaign) at least once before your pint is empty:  3:1
You pretend to overly-enjoy the beer saying things like, “I don’t know guys, it actually kind of refreshes me” as your friends give you strange looks for having to be the douche bag that orders a pint of stout in a hot, crowded bar:  3:1